Dear Future Nikki

Dear Future Nikki,

As I have been applying for jobs to truly get my career started, I have come to the realization that I have gotten a lot done in the past six years (2013-2019). I’m certainly not trying to pat myself on the back, but these past few years have been anything but easy. Right after I graduated I applied for jobs, and had a number of interviews throughout the past few months. Remember that one time that I thought I had made it? I thought without a doubt I would start my career in June 2019 at a university not far from where I live. After a great phone interview and a successful in-person interview, I felt very connected to this college. I waited for the invitation to return to the university for what I thought could’ve been a dream job. I checked my email one day and got a rejection reply. At first I was very bummed, and I began to worry that I was a failure.

I want you to think about the last sentence that I just wrote. I’m here to tell you that this type of thinking is nonsense. I have only been out of school for about 4 months. In the past 6 years, I have gotten a bachelor’s degree and a master’s degree with no breaks whatsoever. That in itself is an accomplishment. Education changed you for the better, and you will find a career. I’m not here to brag, and I know that college isn’t for everyone — but college was for you, and there is nothing wrong with that. I am here to tell you that things take time. It took you 13 years to get through school, four years to get through your undergrad, two years to get your master’s degree, and it took you eight years to marry the love of your life. Do you want to know what you were doing during those years of hard work? You were counting down the days to reach your next big goal or accomplishment. Enjoying the moment was an alien idea to you. You had always worked hard to meet that next big thing, and perhaps more importantly, to overcome some of the issues that you were born into.

Now everything is different. Starting this career is about what is best for you and your family. One day your career will begin, and you will be wondering why you didn’t enjoy your life before you started working. One day you won’t remember what it was like to not work.

I am writing this to you, my future self, to remind you to enjoy the moment. Life is fleeting, and you can brood on that fact, or you can get out there and live.

Much love,

Your past self ❤️

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Nikki // Normal Happenings

Nikki Estes. Grad student [ Communications | English | Literature | Writing ]. I like running, anything caffeinated, and promoting education.

4 thoughts on “Dear Future Nikki

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